Domestic abuse is often associated with physical harm or emotional manipulation. However, there is another form of domestic abuse that’s incredibly common yet rarely talked about: Financial abuse.
It can happen in romantic relationships, within families, or between carers and vulnerable adults. And because it often hides behind everyday actions – like managing bills or asking about daily spending – it can be hard to recognise, let alone escape. Here’s how to spot it, and where to turn for help if you’re concerned that you’re losing your financial independence and control over your own money to someone else.
How do I know if I’m experiencing financial abuse?
Financial abuse can be difficult to recognise. It doesn’t always look dramatic or obvious, but it can leave you feeling isolated, anxious, or trapped. From having to ask permission to spend your money, to being blocked from working or forced into debt, financial abuse takes away your independence. It often starts subtly and escalates over a period of time, often without the victim being aware of what’s happening.
This type of domestic abuse can take many forms, but will often fall into one of these three main categories or modes of behaviour according to the UK government:
1. Restriction
You may be restricted in what you’re ‘allowed’ to buy with your own money. You could be made to justify every expense, stopped from using the car, or forced to hand over any purchase receipts.
2. Exploitation
Abusers may find opportunities to exploit you, taking your wages, selling your belongings, taking out loans in your name, or forcing you to cover household bills while contributing nothing themselves.
3. Sabotage
Some abusers intend to sabotage their victims. This might include stopping you from working, limiting your hours, blocking access to benefits, or deliberately damaging your financial stability.
If you feel anxious about spending your own money, don’t have access to your own accounts, or find yourself in debt because of someone else’s actions, these may be signs of financial abuse.
Can financial abuse happen without physical or emotional abuse?
Yes, it can.
Financial abuse doesn’t always come with bruises or threats. In some cases, it’s used to maintain control without a single raised voice or hand. That said, financial abuse is often part of a wider pattern of manipulative behaviour. It frequently occurs alongside emotional, psychological, or physical abuse, reinforcing dependency and making it even harder for someone to leave or seek help.
What’s the difference between financial control and financial abuse?
Financial abuse is a broad term. It covers a wide range of behaviours designed to take away someone’s financial independence, limit their options, and keep them reliant on another person.
Financial control is just one of the possible behaviours seen in financial abuse. It usually involves dictating what a person can and can’t spend money on or restricting their access to financial resources – even their own. Some common signs of financial control include monitoring spending, taking control of a person’s bank accounts, or requiring them to ask permission for purchases.
While financial control may be framed as ‘help’ or ‘guidance’, it becomes abuse when it strips away autonomy or causes distress. If someone else decides how your money is used, without your full and free consent, that’s a problem, and it’s important that you know where to turn to for help.
Where can I get help if I’m financially dependent on my abuser?
If you’re experiencing financial abuse, help is available.
Call the Financial Support Line (0808 196 8845), run by Money Advice Plus and Surviving Economic Abuse, or the National Domestic Abuse Helpline (0808 2000 247), open 24/7. These services can help you understand your rights, plan for safety, and access financial support for debts and essential costs. A family solicitor can also help you to obtain legal protection from your abuser and help you to regain control of your finances and your independence.
Remember: If you’re in immediate danger, call 999.
What are the first steps to financial independence after abuse?
Rebuilding your finances after abuse can feel overwhelming, but you don’t have to do it alone.
Here’s how to start:
- Understand your situation: Gather documents, check your credit file, and note any debts
- Seek expert advice: Legal and financial professionals can help you understand your rights
- Open your own bank account: This is an important step in regaining control
- Make a realistic budget: Focus on essentials and build gradually toward long-term stability
- Think about your future: Whether that’s re-entering work, retraining, or rebuilding savings
At National Legal Service, we help people take back control, safely and with confidence. Contact us to talk to an experienced family solicitor about next steps and how we can help.
